Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Hello? Yeah, hi. Is this the Helpdesk?

What I'm trying to do:
I want to put my photo on Blogger so that when I comment on other people's Blogger blogs, I have a little photo icon.

What I know:
When you click on "Edit profile" it has an option for uploading a photo. Not upload. A link. You can type in a url to a photo. Then there's this little link that says "click here for photo hosting" or something. If you click on that link, it takes you to Hello and Picasa.

So now what?
I HAVE Hello and Picasa from the days back before Blogger let you post photos to your blog. But I don't see how that helps me. Can someone tell me how to get a photo that's on Picasa onto my Blogger profile?

Please leave DETAILED instructions in the comments if you know how to help. Thanks!

UPDATE 10:27 p.m.
Damn, you guys. I am trying but I am JUST NOT GETTING IT. The Blogger profile asks for a "Photo URL" but when I put in a web address it gives me this error message:

"The file at the specified URL does not have an acceptable extension (.jpg, .jpeg, .png, .gif)."

Now WTF does THAT mean???? God, this should be easy. Everyone else is doing it. Why can't I get this??

News flash: God Transcends Political Parties.

The guest on "The Colbert Report" last night said:

"The problem with the religious right is that they've made Jesus a Republican."
which I think may be the smartest thing anyone's ever said about religion and politics.

Monday, February 27, 2006

Overheard on Big Daddy's conference call this afternoon:

"Look here, Crackhead."

Sign up for his management seminar today. Space is limited.

Saturday, February 25, 2006

Spring Cleaning Shopping

I was talking to another mom at My Kid's basketball game this morning (Won! 37-29) and she mentioned that the kids' Spring Break is only a couple weeks away! Which totally snuck up on me.

Naturally, since I'm not even working, the schedules are perfect for a vacation!

Which means....SHOPPING!

I don't even know where we might be going yet and not every place is averaging 60 degrees the way we are here, so this may be a bit premature. Still, a girl's gotta plan for upcoming seasons, no?

This dress is very cute, and I can see it with a flirty pair of espadrilles. Also, this dress looks very flattering, very Audrey Hepburn. And if I were actually working this summer, I would totally get these shoes, which I must admit mad, passionate love for. Maybe I should just go ahead and get them in case a dream job suddenly comes through.

Is it just me, or would you look like you were wearing this skirt backwards?

Some of this Juicy stuff is cute, but I just cannot see myself wearing terry cloth. Just....no.

This is just a little too "Bree" for me. I can see Gabriella looking very fresh in this. Ugh - way too "Edie". And look - Lynette. Susan's the hardest. I think she'd look great in a wrap dress (you know, because she has no boobs), but she'd probably prefer something fun & funky, or this hippie-chic.

Seriously? Are you sure this isn't meant to be a beach cover-up?

Ahh, internet window shopping....my favorite hobby.


Friday, February 24, 2006

Now that I've FINALLY seen 'Rent'

If I didn't already love Jesse L. Martin from when he was on 'Law & Order,' I sure do love him now.

Another figure skating question

Forget the jumps and spins and axles and lutzes and loops and toe loops and salchows. How the hell do they hold their arms up like that for four minutes??

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Two things I noticed while watching the Women's Figure Skating Long Program tonight

Number One
Even though everyone is talking about how no one understands the new figure skating scoring system, and the commentators can often be heard commentating about how even the skaters, when viewing their scores, don't appear to totally understand it either, I've yet to see Dick Buttons or anyone at NBC explain it to the viewers. Which is just to say, I have no idea what the scores mean, but why is Scott Hamilton yelling at that girl to WAIT TEN SECONDS FOR THE BONUS? What the hell is he talking about?

Number Two
When you see the trailer for 'The Divinci Code,' please notice how much Audrey Tautou's hair looks like mine. Now, you might say, 'But Kalisah, we haven't seen a photo of you lately. What exactly does your hair look like these days?' To which I would reply, 'Like Audrey Tautou's in 'The Divinci Code'.' A-hem.

Ask me if My Kid's b'ball team beat the #1 team in the league tonight.

Why yes! Yes, they did beat the #1 team in the league tonight! 29-27. And My Kid had 8 points. It went right down to the wire and the look of pure joy on those boys' faces when they won was PRICELESS in the truest sense of the word. I wouldn't trade it for anything. Even Manolos.

We hate that team - the Lakers. They have the yellingest coach in the league. Sometimes when he yells he scares the bejeezus out of me and makes me jump. And I'm sitting on the opposite side of the gym. So it was quite satisfying to beat them. Even our coach was thrilled. THRILLED, I tell ya. The first thing he said to the boys after the game was, "Forget the rest of the season! This IS our season right here! You proved you could hang with the best of the best." I'm so freaking proud.

Q: When is 39 with no wrinkles NOT a good thing?

A: When you're 39 with ZITS instead. Big, red zit, right between the eyebrows. I look like some kind of Hindu princess. Gah. Can my skin just please grow up now?

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Isn't it ironic, don't you think?

OK, so this woman that I've been doing freelance work for? Let's call her 'Dixie.' She was a VP at the hospital where I used to work. I worked with her a lot there, but I never actually worked for her. Three years ago she left and started her own PR firm. She's also in local politics. She's an elected official. So she gets a lot of political candidates as clients. She doesn't run their campaigns, per se, but she'll do design work for them (logos, yard signs, hand bills, etc.) and handle the PR for the campaign. (Some of 'em need it more than others, if you know what I mean - politicians and all.)

Now, this agency that I used to work for? That laid me off? Let's call him 'Joe.' They had one political candidate as a client - a high-ranking county official who is running for re-election; we'll call him 'Rob.' When I left the agency, we were only doing design work for him (mostly invites to fundraisers thrown by various local well-knowns) but 'Joe' came to my office and asked if I'd done any political PR and said that we were getting this client and I should plan on doing PR for the campaign as the time came.

You can see where this is going, right?

So Tuesday I was downtown at 'Dixie's' office. We'd just had lunch with a new client that I'll be working on for her. And she gets this phone call while I'm sitting in her office. And she's making all these faces at me and mouthing 'NEW BUSINESS!!' and pointing at the phone. And I'm listening to the conversation and thinking that this sounds big. So I go ask the girl who answered the phone, "Who is 'Dixie' talking to?" And she says, "'Rob.'"

So, the long & the short of if (mostly long, sorry. Are you keeping up so far?) is that 'Rob' called her directly - himself - and asked if he could talk to her about doing PR for his campaign. And I'm all "Well. Huh. What happened to 'Joe'?" 'Rob' asked to meet at a breakfast meeting tomorrow morning. AND....he's bringing 'Joe' to the meeting.

From what I can gather, 'Rob' hasn't historically done well at the polls with women. And there's a pretty strong female candidate running against him. So that's probably why he wants a woman's PR company to work on it. (Funny thing is, he's a republican and 'Dixie' is actually a democrat....as am I. But we're businesswomen first so we can put that aside.)

So today I get an email from 'Dixie' and she says, "You wanna sit across from 'Joe' in a breakfast meeting tomorrow?" And that Alanis song starts playing in my head.

Because maybe it's a woman-thing, or maybe 'Joe' could have done the PR for the campaign his own self IF HE HAD ENOUGH STAFF TO HANDLE IT.

Either way, looks good on MY resume, baybee.

Monday, February 20, 2006

I've figured out the #1 place to run into people you haven't seen in 10 years

The pediatrician's office.

This is the second visit in a row this has happened to me.

And, is it just me, or are we typically there because we've been up all night with a kid who's coughing his head off?

I'm lucky if I manage to get all the appropriate undergarments on, and this other mom looks like Isabella freaking Rossellini.

Grey's Anatomy this week

I'm so frustrated that the post for this week's Grey's Anatomy episode isn't up yet! I'm always so anxious to hear what they have to say about it. The writer's focus of the show always sheds new light on the plot.

So what'd you think?

I love that there's a new hunk to add some more depth to the love triangle of Mer/Der/Addison. And make no mistake, a fourth person doesn't turn the triangle into a square, it turns it into some kind of weird 12-point star, b/c just consider the triangular possibilities:
1. Mer/Der/Add
2. Der/Add/Mark
3. Der/Mer/Mark
4. Mer/Mark/Add
See? The plot thickens!

I love that Mark called it in his second scene of the show: "He saw me in bed with his wife and he just walked away. He sees me just talking to you and I'm on the floor."

Still....as Carmen asked....did Derek slug Mark because of Meredith? Or Addison? Hmm....

I did not love that Meredith is hooking up with George. She doesn't love him. It can only be trouble. I think she's just lonely but this will not end up good.

Anyway, that Mark is a hottie! I hope he's gong to stick around a bit. Anyone know where I recognize him from? I'm trying to figure out what else he's been in.

Saturday, February 18, 2006

Writers Block

Ten years ago this March 1, Big Daddy's sister died. She was 49 and she had cancer - multiple myeloma, which apparently they can cure or at least control now as apparent in the life of Geraldine Ferraro. But Ellie, she was dead within a year of her diagnosis.

Her husband is putting together a memory book for the tenth anniversary of her death. His family's like that. Which is nice. In my family, we try to ignore the fact that Dad died. Much better to ignore those emotions because you know, if you push them down deep enough, they'll go away completely. So the husband, he sent this email that said 'Not a day goes by without something reminding me of Ellie or my thinking “what would Ellie have done?” It seems every week someone shares with me a memory of Ellie.' and '“The memories of those we love are a blessing forever”' which is so beautiful.

So Big Daddy forwards the email to me and says 'Will you write something? For us?' Sure, I say. No problem. For me. The writer.

Agh, the pressure.

You know I hardly knew Ellie. She called me in the hospital when My Kid was born, which I thought was big of her since she'd never met me. She sure did sound excited on the phone though.

The first time I met her, she was in the hospital. She was already sick. I never knew Ellie when she wasn't sick.

I remember when we were going through that year that she was an amazing spirit. It's just hard for me to remember it all now.

I promised Big Daddy I'd have something to his brother-in-law this weekend. I don't know where to start though. I asked him 'Is there anything in particular you want me to write about?' 'No,' he said.

I just don't have that many memories of Ellie. And since I'm 'The Writer' I want to write something that will be beautiful and moving to the rest of the family. God, I'm so fucking self-centered. Making this all about me.

Anyway, I thought it would help loosen up my brain a bit to write about it here first. I'll let you know how it goes.

Pinpoint Dopplar Radar says....

So I don't think Winter Storm 2006 was quite as bad as the TV news predicted. There's something covering the grass and there's white stuff on the house roofs (snow?) and they're saying the streets are slick but since the wind chill is 12, I'm not venturing out to see. And of course everything in town this weekend - including My Kid's basketball game, for which he appears to be holding me personally responsible - has been cancelled. Even church. Some sort of winter parcipitation is coming down outside because I can hear it hitting my window, so I assume it's sleet since snow is q-u-i-e-t. Last night I made chili and baked brownies and today I'm making white chicken chili in the crock pot and my office is warm and bright despite the severe dullness outside the window. I've got the Olympics on, finding it amazing that anyone can get that excited about crosscountry skiing and shooting rifles, and my laptop is on my desk so that I can watch TV the American way - while online - and there's a comfy throw and my bed pillow on the futon couch in here where I alternate sitting at the computer with curling up with a good book. It's good. More weekends should be like this. Although Big Daddy might disagree, since he's been on conference calls since I got up this morning.

Friday, February 17, 2006

In need of: a religious scholar

In light of the winter storm warning, I made Big Daddy take me to the book store tonight. My last trip to Barnes & Noble ended up highly disappointing - only one of the three books I bought was any good (one was so bad I couldn't even read it) and that was The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver. It was beautifully written - very lyrical and passionate and I learned so much from it, which I think was her intention. Thanks god for the big world map behind my desk, because my African geography? Not so hot.

Several times the book references the "Apocrypha." Now, I grew up Mormon, as you know, and we had our own additional scriptures but this? I've never heard of. The storytellers (the daughters) say that their father, the pastor, believed in the Apocrypha, much to the dismay of the Baptist leaders. When I looked it up on Wikipedia, it was all so technical and confusing, but it sounds like it's an addition to the Catholic Bible??? Is that true? Why have I never heard of this? And anyway, the pastor in the book didn't like Catholics, so that doesn't really make any sense to me.

If you know anything about this, please comment now. Thanks.

PS - Snowboard Cross is the funnest sport ever added to the Olympic games! Whoever came up with that, I'm betting they were high at the time.

Soulsville (updated)

Last night I went to this political fund-raiser event at Stax Museum. First of all, what a cool place! I mean, way, way cool place. With tons of really cool stuff. Like Isaac Hayes' sky blue Cadillac with white fur carpet and solid gold trim. It cost $26,000 back in the 70s.

But, in all honesty - seriously? They really think that tourists are going to visit there? Because it is smack dab in the middle of South Cracktown. I know it is the original location of the studio and all and that it was a soul record company, which means "black music." But do they only think that African-Americans will want to visit there? Because I honestly would not visit that neighborhood on my own, no offense Black Moses. But it really is a most amazing place.

Since we've been on the topic of music (iTunes, and all), here's a few other music mentions:

  • I think James Blunt's song "Beautiful" may possibly be the most perfect song ever written. They say he wrote it about an ex-girlfriend. Could you imagine someone that talented (and cute) writing (& singing) that song for you? *Swoon*
  • If I ever met Bobbie Brown, I think I would start singing "My Perrogative" to him. Do you think he would join in and sing it with me? I think he would. Especially if the cameras were rolling.
  • Well thanks god. Britney is going to fill the "lull" in pop music. I'm all atwitter.
  • So, I heard that Three 6 Mafia is going to sing the "Hustle & Flow" song at the Oscars. Remember last year how Beyonce (yawn) sang all of the Oscar-nominated songs? And this year, everyone is like 'I wonder who's going to sing the Hustle & Flow song?' b/c I just don't see that bootie-shaking-dancer-wannabe belting out how hard it is out here for a pimp. So everyone thought 'Well, maybe Terrance will sing it,' since he sang it in the movie. But then I hear no! Three 6 is singing at the Oscars!! Remember a couple years ago when that Aerosmith song from that ridiculous drilling-on-the-astroid-Bruce-Willis movie was nominated? And Liv Tyler was on the red carpet saying 'OMG!!! Here we are and whoever would think that my dad would sing at the Oscars???' Well, that's kinda how we feel in Memphis today.

And FYI, we're getting iced-in tonight. And you can't even imagine how crowded Blockbuster was this evening.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

In need of some techie guidance

Here's my problem:

I have the iPod Nano that holds 500 songs. But I've downloaded more than 500 songs to my iTunes account.

Here's what I want to do:

I want to download (or upload?) some of my songs from iTunes to my iPod. I do not want to delete any of my songs from my iTunes account since, duh, they're paid for.

Here's what I understand I CAN do, but don't know how:

Supposedly you can create playlists (which I have) and then choose which playlists to download (or upload) into your iPod. But I don't know how to do that. When I plug in my iPod and iTunes is open, it just automatically starts down(up)loading and then it gives me a warning or an error message that says there are too many songs to down/upload.

If you know how to do this, please leave me instructions in the comments. I'm so helpless. They'll need to be step-by-step instructions starting with how to set up my account or whatever. De. Tails, people. Thanks!

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

My Valentine

I don't really do Hallmark Holidays, but in honor of the occasion, I give you:

Getting to Know Big Daddy
1. When Big Daddy yawns, he sounds just like Chewbacca.
2. Big Daddy is a workaholic, but it's totally paid off in his career.
3. Big Daddy likes war movies.
4. And '24'
5. And 'Lost'
6. But he totally doesn't get how network TV works. He'll come in when I'm watching Gilmore Girls at 9:30 a.m. on ABC Family and say, "Is this a re-run?"
7. Big Daddy is very tight with money.
8. But he loves to buy stuff for his family, and money is no object.
9. When we were dating, he said that Valentines Day was his favorite holiday because "it's the day you say 'I Love You' the biggest way you know how."
10. Big Daddy doesn't cook often, but when he does, he makes a huge mess in the kitchen.
11. Big Daddy wouldn't notice that the trash needed taking out if it overflowed onto the floor and started wrapping around his legs like a dancing cobra.
12. Big Daddy buys and drinks sugar-free Rock Stars by the case.
13. Big Daddy played football in high school, but his temper was too short and he cussed out his coach and walked off the field one day and never went back.
14. Big Daddy's brothers & sister were all 20 years' older than him. He was a "menopause miracle" (his mom was 49 and thought she was going through menopause but was really pregnant. Can you imagine???)
15. Big Daddy is completely addicted to XBox. Unreasonably addicted. Fights-with-his-son-over-it-like-two-little-kids addicted.
16. Big Daddy sleeps in shifts - a few hours at night, a few hours in the late afternoon. It's his own special form of insomnia.
17. Big Daddy has really, really good taste. Exceptionally good taste. He has picked out every formal dress I've owned and they have been knock-outs.
18. The only famous woman Big Daddy's ever had an attraction to is Reese Witherspoon, and he's got a mad crush on her.
19. It was Big Daddy's idea that I go blonde (see #18).
20. Big Daddy is such a huge basketball fan that he used to record the NCAA tournament so he could watch it over and over when the season was over and he had basketball withdrawal.
21. Big Daddy is a whiz at Scrabble. I've seen him score over 100 points on one word.
22. Big Daddy types by hunt & peck with two fingers, but probably types 65 or 70 wpm. He's very fast.
23. Big Daddy has a genius business mind. He could easily make a living as a consultant telling people how to make their business a success.
24. Big Daddy owns all the Adam Sandler DVDs except that one where he plays the devil or whatever.
25. His favorite is the golf one where he beats up Bob Barker.
26. Big Daddy's favorite actors are Clint Eastwood and John Wayne.
27. Big Daddy used to have a pair of lucky socks that he wore whenever he had a big meeting or business deal. I don't know what ever happened to those.
28. His favorite clothing is his gray FedEx sweatshirt.
29. Big Daddy is not afraid to give the smackdown to vendors or employees.
30. I imagine he's actually kind of difficult to work for since he's so smart and he thinks everyone else is a complete idiot.
31. When Big Daddy was a teenager, he was a bit of a troublemaker.
32. He once drove a golf cart into a lake at his dad's club.
33. I seem to remember that he once drove his dad's Chrysler into a lake, too.
34. Big Daddy looks old for his age because he's prematurely gray. (It runs in his family.)
35. If I had to pick one word to describe Big Daddy, it would be DEDICATED.

On his tombstone, they can say "He scared the bejeezus out of us"

"The ocean is the largest wilderness on the planet and it is right at our back door. And while we would no more go into the jungle dressed in a bathing suit and carrying with us for protection a book and a tube of suntan cream, we seem to feel that we have the right to safety by stepping into this enormous wilderness where 80 percent of the living things on the planet live, and have to eat."

--Peter Benchley,
March 2000

Monday, February 13, 2006

I don't know how stay-at-home women do it!

So I haven't really been keeping up with posting lately. I've been working a lot - which, yea! But not really 40 hours. So you'd think I'd have plenty of time on my hands. But nooooo! My sponsor says I'm not getting to enough AA meetings. And my back is telling me I'm not getting to enough yoga classes. And Big Daddy keeps telling me that I'm not shaving my legs enough. And there's laundry piling up (doesn't it EVER go away??). And no, I did not cook dinner tonight.

Wednesday evening I'm having dinner with Amy from my old office so I can tell her about all the exciting new clients I'm working with now. Thursday evening there's a fundraiser for one of our political candidate clients. And My Kid has basketball team photos at 6:15. Big Daddy will have to take him to that. Saturday is a gala we've partnered on that I got roped into working ("Hey! What about the NEW GIRL? Doesn't she have to work too??")

And I haven't even bought Big Daddy a Valentine's Card. God, I suck.

Saturday, February 11, 2006

Something you should know about me (it's gonna come out anyway)

I am an Olympics Junkie.

I fell in love with the Olympics at the age of six, when Olga Korbut stole my heart and I insisted on wearing my hair in tiny pigtails every day (even for my class photo).

There were others: Dorothy, Nadia, Mark, Greg, Eric, Bruce, Katarina, Tara, Oksana, Michelle, Nancy & Tanya, Scott, Mia, Flo-Jo, Bonnie, Dan, Apolo Anton, Picabo, Jonny, Bode....I'm like the Oscar winner who can't name everyone because there's always so many she'll leave out.

So how 'bout them opening ceremonies, eh? I just have one question for the show producers: Where is the ice? Dude, it's snowing IN MEMPHIS but the skaters in the XX Winter Olympiad are on rollerblades. I'm not feeling it.

I loved the singing - especially the little girl - and I'm so disappointed that I fell asleep before Pavarotti. Now I read in the paper that Peter Gabriel sang "Imagine." Wish I'd managed to stay up just a bit longer.

The F1 Ferrari doing donuts was so cool and brought to mind my favorite Italian racer, Alex Zinardi, who was famous for doing donuts after he won a race. (And he won A LOT.) They would always fine him but he kept doing them. Sadly, Alex lost both legs in a race car accident.

The parade of athletes is always fun, but the disco music?? I'm wondering how some of the foreign teams felt about marching in to Donna Summer?

But I think my favorite part was the 400-something people in colored ponchos formed into the giant ski jumper. Way, way cool that.

Let the games begin!

Friday, February 10, 2006

It's snowing!

And it's totally sticking!

1-3 inches on the ground

We're predicted to get "heavy snow" here starting at 3 this afternoon. So last night I went to the grocery store and stocked up on all the essentials:

  • milk
  • eggs
  • 3 boxes of cereal
  • rice krispie treats
  • paper plates
  • napkins
  • hot wings
  • potato chips
  • sliced turkey
Because I'm just practical that way.

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Carmen, I may have to re-think the whole SCHEDULE thing

Yesterday I had lunch with Treasure. We talked about everything that's been going on with both of us. I told her about what happened with the job. And she said the same thing that An said to me last week at lunch:

"Now you can write."

To which I responded the same way I did last week to An:

"I can't! I....I'm not ready! I'm not really that kind of writer! I don't have any ideas! Read my 100 Things! I never wanted to write a book! I just want to be Dooce or Dave Barry and make money by writing a column every day. About whatever I want. I don't know anything about character development! Or symbolism! Or irony! I can't do this! I CAN'T!"

And thank god I have powerful, strong, supportive women in my life. Treasure looked at me and said, "Of course you can. I'll help you."

She suggested that I carve out some specific time every day to write. Then, every couple of days we would send each other a few pages to read and comment on. We'll form a writers' group. An can join too. We'll meet for dinner and talk about each others' writings.

I'm feeling a little overwhelmed. I'm not sure I can do this; I haven't actually started anything yet. But she's inspired me to try.

I have some Grammy questions

If you know the answers, would you leave them in the comments please? Thanks

1. Did Fergie have some work done? I used to think she was so attractive. Now she looks bizarre.

2. What race is Mariah Carey? I know it doesn't matter but I'm really curious confused. When she first hit it big, she looked like a black girl. Now she looks like a white girl. But she sings like a black girl. Either way, I still think she's a no-class skank and I can't stand her screaming voice.

3. If Green Day won for album of the year (American Idiot) last year, how did they win Record of the Year for a song from that album this year? Isn't there, like, a cut-off date or anything?

4. What the hell is an "animated band"? I mean, there are actual musicians playing "Feel Good," right? Who are they? Where are they? I'm so confused.

5. What was Teri Hatcher thinking?

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Anybody want to talk about Grey's Anatomy?


Everybody's talking about it. What'd you think?

It was a little too "ER" for me - the thing I like about the show is that it's really about relationships and not really about hospitaly stuff. BUT....I was totally sucked in.

The whole cliff-hanger thing doesn't really annoy me the way it obviously does some people. I'm much more concerned that they'll try to wrap the story up too quickly. No, I'd rather see it go on and on. Like the heart in Titanic.

Now let me back up and tell you that I totally predicted the show. When they kept running the promos during the game with the "code black" I said, "I bet they open a guy up and there's a live bomb in there!" So I was pretty close.

I was so tired and it was so late for me, but no way I could stop watching it. I think that, even with the high-intensity story line, it still WAS about relationships.

I love Bailey. And George. I love George with Bailey.

The scene where the docs kept coming up to the door and saying, "Oh! Bailey's back?" and then looking in the exam room and she was having her cervix examined? God that was hilarious.

Now, I read an interview with Izzie that said one of the characters dies in the new year. Do you think this is it? Well, it can't be Meredith. Or McDreamy. Or Bailey or George or Izzie. And it's not going to be Sandra Oh. So I'm thinking it might be the chief of surgery. Didn't it look like he's going to have a heart attack in the next episode? Or maybe the wife. Or even Alex. They're both getting kind of boring.

If you haven't been there, the Grey's Anatomy writers' blog provides a lot of insight as to what they're thinking and where their inspiration comes from. It's really good.

So....talk amongst yourselves....do you LOVE this show or what???

Sunday, February 05, 2006

Live Blogging the Super Bowl Ads

I made some chili queso dip, and I bought several large subs from Lenny's when I went out for a coffee earlier today. I heard on the news that more food is consumed on Super Bowl Sunday than any other day of the year except Thanksgiving.

Big Daddy & the Kid are watching the game down in his office on the big screen HDTV. So I've got it on up here in my office and I'm trying to finally finish this damn Tom Wolfe book. God I am so never reading him again. It has NEVER taken me this long to read a book. If I just knew if the guy got off or not I'd put it down and forget it. I'm not dying to finish it - I just want to know what FINALLY happens since I've spent forfreakingever leading up to it.

So, ummm, Go 'Hawks, I guess.

OK, on to what we really tuned in for:
The Diet Pepsi ads with Jay Mohr: I like the one with Jackie Chan where he insists on a stunt double and they put in a Diet Coke can. Funny.

Budweiser horses-playing-football: You can always count on these to be good. I liked the "streaker." Very Funny.

MI3: I wish they would quit letting Tom Cruise make movies. Is that Hoffman with him?? Oh, my opinion of him is totally shot now.

Dove Campaign for Real Beauty: I've always liked this campaign. Aren't they missing their target audience advertising during the Super Bowl though?

Ford Hybrid: You must realize that my first love was KERMIT THE FROG. For our tenth anniversary? Big Daddy gave me all the stuffed Muppets characters. So naturally this ad grabbed my heart and refused to let it go.

Shaq for Desperate Housewives: Fast & funny, just the way I like 'em. This was a good ad. I would've been proud to come up with this idea. Bonus points to whoever convinced Shaq to do it.

GoDaddy.com: I don't get it. Then again, when it comes to degrading women as cheap sex objects, I rarely do.

Did I ever tell you about the time I got to watch the Super Bowl Halftime Show rehearsal? Yeah. I was in San Diego for a Super Bowl-related event for my old job. It was me & Chad, one of our videographers. Our event took place on Saturday night, before the game. Saturday afternoon we were at the stadium setting up for our event, which was to be in a big tent on the stadium grounds. Chad & I wandered over into the stadium - on the way we passed these trailors and GWEN STEFANI came out of one of them!! So we go into the stadium, and I don't even remember what kind of credentials we were wearing, but we must've had something on. And there's a lot of comotion and bustling going on on the field. Getting the stage all set up and everything. And there's this big cherry-picker thing. And then someone leads in a huge group of people - young people, all with wristbands on - and sets them up around the foot of the stage. Then what's-her-name....that country singer from Canada....Shania Twain comes out. With some super-high-heeled black boots on that I was TOTALLY coveting. And she sings her song which was apparently called "Up" or something? And in the end she gets into the cherry-picker and it takes her UP over the crowd at the stage. And they do that a few times. And then GWEN comes out and does her song. With these funny-looking Asian cheerleader-looking girls. And then STING comes out and they do a song TOGETHER. And I am sitting right there, in the lower bowl, right in front of the stage and watching all this. And it is so fucking amazing that I just sit there and watch them practice over and over again and I end up waiting WAY too long to go back to the hotel and wash and straighten my hair and put on my LBD for the event. I wait so long that I'm nowhere near ready to leave in time and I tell Chad to take the rental Bronco to the event and start filming and I'll take a cab and I get there late and almost don't have time to interview RICKY WILLIAMS. God, that was a good day.

Back to the Ads:
ABC/Lost: it was kind of cheesey how they worked it into the actual clips, but "gonna have to face it, you're addicted to LOST" was a pretty funny idea, given the outragous popularity of that show.

Ameriquest "Don't Judge": OK, some people get themselves into some embarrassing, albeit somewhat humorous situations, but what are you trying to sell me here? I don't even know what the point of the ad is. If I were to guess, I'd think it was some sort of investment company, but what then am I not supposed to be judging? Ya got me.

H3 "The Little Monster": that was a STRETCH. I hope they didn't pay much for that concept.

CareerBuilder.com: At first I thought the "I work with monkeys" thing was boring and old, since, didn't they unveil that during LAST YEAR'S Super Bowl? But they finally won me over with "It's okay; I actually work with jackasses."

Sprint "Couch on Fire": I gotta admit, this one made me laugh out loud. I totally wasn't expecting the Keystone Cop and the old man in his boxers.

MasterCard "Little Things": Is that MacGyver? He's so old, I hardly recognized him.

Saturday, February 04, 2006

Team parents are such ASSHOLES.

We nearly had a fight break out at My Kid's basketball game this morning. In the stands. Among the parents.

There's this one kid on our team (the Sonics) whose dad is a real hothead. He yells at the refs a lot and one of the parents told me that last year they would call technicals on him. It's really too bad for his son, because he's a really good player, but it's hard for him to keep his head in the game when his dad is loosing his cool in the stands. The kid is always telling his dad (from the floor) to calm down.

So this morning, we were playing a really good team (the Grizzlies). They went up right away 12 to 4 and then we came back in the second quarter to within a point but then they hit this really long 3-pointer at the buzzer. In the second half they went up again, but we were playing pretty well and hanging in. But then, some fucker in the stands behind the Grizzlies yells out "AIRBALL" to one of our players when he missed a basket. Which is totally shitty - I mean, these are 12-year-olds for pete's sake. I don't blame B's dad for getting pissed off - he was right really, he just didn't handle it right. Frankly, I thought whoever yelled that AT A KID should have been escorted from the gymnasium and told never to return.

So B's dad gets up and walks over to the other groups of parents and says, "Who yelled 'airball'?" and this other parent stands up and says to B's dad, "GO SIT DOWN." and then they start yelling back & forth at each other and B's dad is all, "WHO YELLED AT OUR KIDS?!" and the Grizzlies parents are all "GO. SIT. DOWN." and B's mom is sitting right behind me and she is freaking out and yelling at her husband and trying to get her son-in-law to help because you can tell that she's scared that he's going to hit somebody. Our coach goes up and tries to stop it and then finally the refs realize what's going on and one of them shushes everyone and then says to the crowd, "I think this all started when someone yelled 'airball,' so let's please not yell except for our own team."

And I was so pissed, because FIRST OF ALL, what kind of asshole yells 'airball' at a recreational 12-year-old basketball team? God, I never wanted to beat a team so badly as I did the Grizzlies right then. And SECONDLY, if the ref heard the fan yell 'airball,' I think he should have addressed it right then. Someone has to be in charge, and who else can it be but the refs? He should have turned to the crowd and said, "Please do not yell at the other team, or I will give your team a technical."

So B's dad comes and sits back down behind us and I was saying right out loud, "Who the hell yells at 12-year-olds like that??" and Big Daddy keeps telling me to "shhh" but I was really pissed. They got the game going again but it took a while for the kids to get their concentration back and in the end we lost the game by 11 points and the kids were all so disappointed. We were 4 and 2 before this game and on a 2-game winning streak. They really wanted to beat these Grizzlies.

Another agency I'd gladly work for.

There's a Biscut, Cake, Chocolate and Confectionery Association? Huh. Who knew?

Friday, February 03, 2006

You'd think this list would be longer.

Things I was able to accomplish this week as a work-at-home-mom:
1. Made sandwiches for My Kid when he came home from school.
2. Attended two morning yoga classes (with a bunch of women over 50).
3. And three AA meetings.
4. Logged 10 billable work hours.
5. Baked and decorated valentines cookies with My Kid.
6. Went to lunch with An.
7. Washed, dried and put away four loads of laundry.
8. Cleaned out my office at my old job.
9. Cleaned out and set up my office at the house.
10. Drank 13 coffees from Starbucks.
11. Went grocery shopping.
12. Washed the dog.
13. Re-filled all of the soap dispensers in the house (4).

Things I couldn't seem to accomplish even though I didn't have to go to work:
1. Cooking dinner.
2. Putting clean sheets on the beds, or short of that, at least folding and putting away the pile of clean sheets sitting wadded up on my ironing board.
3. Getting my hair cut & colored.
4. Finishing my Tom Wolfe book. (geez, that man can drag out a story.)
5. Seeing any Oscar-nominated movies.
6. Putting together a portfolio.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Remembering Teresa

My friend Teresa died. She had Stage 4 breast cancer. I saw her at my 20-year high school reunion in 2004; she had just completed her treatment and was preparing for reconstruction surgery. When she got home from the reunion, her doctors found that her cancer had returned, in her bone marrow, and she was gone 18 months later. She left a husband and two young children.

Teresa and I were very good friends in junior high. She played the flute and I played clarinet in the junior high band. We lived within bike-riding distance of each other in Pecan Park and rode the same bus. Teresa had white-blonde hair, just like all the women in her family; she was loud; she had an infectious laugh; and she was boy-crazy. BOY. CRAZY. She was so much fun.

In seventh? or eighth grade? she had a slumber party for her birthday. All the usual suspects from band were there - the group of girls she would remain best friends with throughout high school.

Deana Williams, Tammy Riser, Sara Smith, Diane Reed. Diane, she's gone now, too. She & her boyfriend went missing from a hiking trip out west and have never been seen again. Someone at the reunion said her story was once on "Unsolved Mysteries."

We danced to "The Time Warp" and tried on blue and green and purple mascaras and shared stories of our first kisses. I lied. I'd not been kissed yet in seventh grade, but whatever Sara said I just emphatically exclaimed, "Me too!" as though I had also had my first kiss while on vacation in Washington DC the previous summer.

I had my first cigarette in Teresa's bathroom that night with Dee Daniels. Teresa nailed me on it at school Monday morning. I couldn't believe she found out! As an adult, I can't believe for a second that I thought we could smoke inside someone's house and NOT be caught. Teresa said her mom found ashes in the bathroom. I was horrified. As a good little Mormon girl, freshly graduated from Primary, I was terrified that someone KNEW I'd smoked a cigarette. Nevermind the sinning and breaking the Word of Wisdom part. I was just mortified that people would FIND OUT.

The next morning Mrs. Johnson made us pancakes and we all put on full faces of make-up before going home. I remember Tammy used a safety pin to separate her lashes from her clumpy dial-a-lash mascara.

One Sunday afternoon in seventh grade, I was over at Teresa's house. My mom let me stay there playing instead of coming home and going to Sacrament Meeting with my family. God punished me for that.

I was trying to ride Teresa's bike (which was too big for me, and only had handbrakes, which I was unaccustomed to) and she was trying to ride mind - which was too small for her and her knees practically bumped the handlebars. There was a lot of sand in the street by her house. I don't know if it was because new houses were still being constructed in her area of Pecan Park, or if there was just always a lot of sand around on the coast. But she got my bike stuck in the sand right in front of me and I couldn't stop her bike quickly enough and the front wheel of the bike I was on slammed into the back wheel of the bike she was on. And my feet couldn't reach the ground from the seat of her bike, so I fell. Onto the bar. And felt an extreme pain the likes of which would not be replicated until childbirth.

Teresa's mom drove me home....and dropped me off. And no one was home. My whole family was sitting reverently in Sacrament Meeting where I should have been and no harm would have befallen me. And here I was, bleeding profusely from my vaginal region and this woman just dropped me off and left me there alone! Which seems kind of weird now. I looked up the church number and called my mom and she rushed home and took me to the hospital where I had to spend the night to determine whether or not I needed stitches down there (I did not).

My mom tried to make me feel better by telling me about when she was my age and she left the skating rink and fell and hit her newly blossoming boob on the corner of the concrete and nearly passed out from the pain. I was just afraid I wouldn't be able to have babies anymore.

The nurse on my floor asked me where I went to school and when I told her, she said, "Oh yeah, we had another girl from your school in here for the same thing a couple weeks ago. Suzanne Gautier, do you know her?" Which of course I knew her. It was a small school AND she was a cheerleader and that probably broke all sorts of federal privacy laws for her to tell me that or I don't know - maybe our medical records weren't private back in pre-HIPPA days.

Anyway, I was out of school for a week but Teresa was kind enough not to tell people what was really wrong with me since you can image how mortified a seventh grade girl would be for her classmates to know that she was in a bike wreck and broke her girly parts.

And thus ends my walk down Teresa Johnson Memory Lane. Good night, angel.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

This is the ad agency I want to work for

Who the hell writes jingles for local company commercials? GOD THEY SUCK.