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Easter Sunday Revelations

Number 1:
No route exists that can get me from my house to Kroger on Sunday morning without getting caught up in church traffic.

Number 2:
The joke about "No one's here but us heathens" doesn't go over very big when the boy is more than likely, even as he bags your groceries, saying a prayer of repentence to the Lord that he will be forgiven for working rather than attending church on the day that His Son rose from the dead and will only serve to have your groceries bagged in a completely illogical way and you will be carrying them to the car yourself even though it's raining because that's what kind of red state you live in.