Friday Night Plight
DATELINE: SOFA, L.R. (October 20, 2006) -- I have lots of options this week as I veg out on the sofa. I recorded but didn't have time to watch Studio 60, Grey's, and The Office. Also, my kind-hearted husband got tired of listening to me bitch and so he ordered Showtime AND Showtime OnDemand so I can catch up on all the episodes of Weeds. Big Daddy's gone to see that Iwo Jima movie with his dad, and the Kid is at the haunted corn maze with his girlfriend and a group of their friends, so I've got the house to myself and some much-needed peace and quiet.
This week has been particularly difficult for me. We launched our web site at 5 a.m. Tuesday morning, and that's a pretty big chunk of my project, so it equaled several extra hours on this week's timesheet. For the most part, I've enjoyed being back at the old job - there are a lot of differences this time. For one thing, I had spent eight years in the Communications Department. Hell, I WAS the Communications Department. But this project is such a monster that they just don't want to support it down there, so the communications role has been moved up to the business team. Different department, different floor, completely different group of co-workers. That part of it's been pretty good. Except for the fact that my cube is by the elevators which can get pretty loud and disruptive (especially around the lunch hour), these changes have all been improvements.
Another difference has been that, as a consultant, I haven't had to put up with a lot of the politics and bullshit that go on in places of employment. But this week, a lot of things seemed to get to me. Or maybe I let a lot of things get to me? I took things personally. I became too personally invested in my work. And it exhausted me. Completely and totally exhausted me. I was so tired today, I just didn't even have the energy to talk. I broke down into tears getting ready for work this morning b/c I just didn't see how I would have the energy to get through the day.
Right now I'm watching Steel Magnolias on Lifetime, and I don't even have the energy to say the lines out loud.
One of the best parts about returning is getting back my friend Mary who was always my support system there. We were each other's support system. This week when I was in her office, bitching and complaining bitterly about this other consultant that we have to work with who is a complete ass and a real bane of our existence, a man whose complete lack of sensitivity and common courtesy we were at that moment about to have to deal with (via email), I saw that Mary had written "State the facts." on her whiteboard. Underneath that, I added: "Do not engage in character assassination." Rules to Work By.
Next week we shall also attempt to include: "Do not become personally invested in issues controlled by others." I can't take another week like this. It's just too exhausting.